Monday, October 1, 2012

Victim's Father & Former Bully Teach About Suicide

"Andy Lehman was an honor student, scholarship semifinalist, musician, and math whiz. Andy was repeatedly harassed, pushed, called names, and not allowed to sit down on his high school bus. In September of 2006, he took his life.
The student who bullied Andy, Kirk Zajac, now teams up with Andy’s father, Nicholas, to talk at schools about stopping bullying as a part of their work with the Suicide Prevention Education Alliance in the Greater Cleveland area.
On Sunday, writer Regina Brett dedicated a column in The Plain Dealer to highlighting the experiences of the bully (Kirk), the victim (Andy), and the bystanders. I encourage you to read it — twice!
One section in Regina’s column is, in my opinion, very relevant to the ongoing national attention on bullying and suicide.
“Nicholas could have yelled or thrown him out or threaten to sue. Instead, he thanked Kirk for having the courage to come forward. Nicholas knew that the bullying pushed Andy over the edge, but depression, divorce and financial strains took Andy to the edge.”
It takes a strong father to reach out his hand to the bully who badgered his son. It takes an even stronger father to publicly acknowledge that while bullying was a stressor, there were other factors at home which made his son vulnerable to the point of one additional stressor pushing him over the edge.
While the focus by many is on getting anti-bullying laws passed, the real attention needs to be on providing better mental health support to prevent vulnerable kids like Andy from ever getting too close to the edge. Kids like Andy deserve more help, as do their families at times when they are struggling with the many life stressors coming their way."
Ken Trump

October: National Bullying Prevention Month

  1. National Safe Schools Week & Bullying Prevention Month: Who ...

 

Friday, September 28, 2012

Transparency of GCS/NC Reporting of School Crime

"According to Guilford County Schools' policies for high school students, an incident that's considered an aggressive action includes hitting, biting, shoving, kicking, spitting or throwing objects toward a student or adult.
The student can be suspended from school for up to three days for the first incident.
Students committing more serious assaults on school employees can be suspended from school for at least 10 days or get reassigned to alternative education.
They will also not be allowed to return to that teacher's classroom unless the teacher agrees. Police will also be notified.
...
(GCS Chief of Staff Nora) Carr said assaults on school employees are rare in the district, and she was unable to cite a previous incident.
State data on school crime and suspensions shows that last school year, Guilford County Schools reported 84 assaults on school personnel, which includes volunteers.
Dudley High reported two such offenses, according to the state data.
Those assaults do not include serious injuries, based on how the state tracks assaults.
Guilford County Schools didn’t report any assaults that caused serious injury last year, state data shows."



By News & Record Sarah Newell Williamson


If you are threatened or feel unsafe, complete and file a police statement ASAP. Retain the original copy: needed if petition the court for a Restraining Order.

<- Click left page: Law Enforcement: School Crime/“Assault” definition www.saferschools.blogspot.com

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Character Point Average (C.P.A.)

  1. The Science of Good Character…Two Schools' Journey to Success ...

    Sep 20, 2011 – The Science of Good Character… ... students at the KIPP Infinity Middle School receive a C.P.A (Character Point Average) based on a two page ...
  2. www.nytimes.com/.../what-if-the-secret-to-success-is-failure...

    Paul Tough
    Sep 14, 2011 – Wouldn't it be cool, he mused, if each student graduated from school with not only a G.P.A. but also a C.P.A., for character-point average? If you ...
  3. atlantablackstar.com/2012/09/.../character-trumps-grade-point-averag...
    – Are you more interested in your child's grade point average or his or her character and sense of personal responsibility?
  4. marymeganhoward.edublogs.org/.../moral-vs-performance-character...
    Sep 15, 2011 – You've heard of a Grade Point Average? What about a Character Point Average? As I read Paul Tough's article, I couldn't stop thinking of the ...
  5. (Blog) Character Point Average: Grades Matter, But...

    Apr 26, 2012 – Director of LD Resources & Essential Information Sheldon H. Horowitz, Ed.D., reflects on efforts to evaluate student character development and ...
  6. Character Point Average: Grades matter, but...

    Apr 26, 2012 – character point average kids Parents, educators, and especially teenagers complain that too much attention is paid to grades and test scores.

Monday, September 24, 2012

Never Give Up (4:56 & 9:21 min videos)

We cannot place limits on what we are capable of doing, because we often don't know our own potential. Arthur Boorman was a disabled veteran of the Gulf War for 15 years, and was told by his doctors that he would never be able to walk on his own, ever again. They were wrong... 

  Watch Never Give Up >>

Friday, September 21, 2012

It Takes a Village to Raise Bullies

"I’m beginning to believe that bullying is not a problem of two parents and a child; it seems to be a problem of entire communities.

When a bully named Scott targeted me in junior high (middle school), it wasn’t just him. It was Scott, his six friends and the school’s principal.
One day, Scott informed me during the bus ride to school that he wanted to beat me up. His anger toward me was intense, but I never knew why.
Word got out by late morning that there was going to be a big fight off campus. Being shy at that age, I had told no one.
Toward the afternoon, the principal caught me in the hallway and told me that if I fought, I’d be suspended or thrown out of school. I told him that I didn’t want to fight, but that Scott and company planned to gang up on me at my bus stop.
“That’s your problem,” the principal said. “Just get out of the fight.”

I told the principal that if I avoided the fight, I’d be a target for the rest of the school year. The principal again told me that was my problem.
There was no kindness or concern in this man’s heart. He was just worried about the school’s image.
All during the bus ride home, I was taunted by Scott and his gang, mostly weak boys emboldened by Scott’s cockiness. I knew that if I fought Scott, they would never bother me again.
But despite my shyness, I loved school. I wasn’t about to get suspended or thrown out.
I also was the strongest runner in my school. So two stops before my own, I jumped off the bus and ran home.
Scott and his gang missed their chance. To my surprise, no one bothered me much for the next few weeks.
Then, while passing one of Scott’s lackeys in a vestibule where no one was present, Jan knocked all of the books out of my hands. The boy laughed, saying he “owned” me. “Wimp.”
Without thinking, I punched Jan in the chest, knocking him against the wall. I watched him slide to the floor completely winded. No one from Scott’s gang ever bothered me again.
After that, Jan stopped hanging around with Scott. The boy would even move to the other side of the hallway whenever he saw me.
But to be honest, I lucked out. I think Scott was having other problems that made him forget about me. In the end, I was more angry with the school principal.
Still, my experiences were nothing compared with what is happening to Billy White in Arkansas. This boy gets beat up on a regular basis, and the school has completely failed to stop the cruelty, reports The New York Times.
Several of the incidents, which have required stitches, were even caught on video. The Times posted photos of Billy’s abused body.
Perhaps most disconcerting to me is that Billy’s parents let him continue on at the school. I mean, there’s fighting the good fight, but Billy, who already suffers from learning disabilities, is growing up fearful of education.
Why does this family want to stay in a community complicit with torturing this boy? Some of the students even “started a Facebook page called ‘Every One That Hates Billy Wolfe.’ ”
After one incident, a school official refused to call police, saying Billy got what he deserved. Another school official complained that Billy’s demeanor was to blame. Gee, do you think a boy who has been getting attacked since he was 12 and fears going to school is going to act normal?
No, most of us know what the real problem is: parents and communities that encourage kids to pick on the weak like a pack of hyenas."

from DAD Talk: Dedicated to the Most Important People in the World

Monday, September 17, 2012

How do you know if your child is being bullied or if your child is bullying another?

Check out these warning signs compiled by StopBullying.gov:

Signs a child may be bullied
 
* Comes home with damaged or missing clothing or other belongings
* Reports losing items such as books, electronics, clothing, or jewelry
* Has unexplained injuries
* Complains frequently of headaches, stomachaches, or feeling sick
* Has trouble sleeping or has frequent bad dreams
* Has changes in eating habits
* Hurts themselves
* Is very hungry after school from not eating lunch
* Runs away from home
* Loses interest in visiting or talking with friends
* Is afraid of going to school or other activities with peers
* Loses interest in school work or begins to do poorly in school
* Appears sad, moody, angry, anxious or depressed when he comes home
* Talks about suicide
* Feels helpless
* Feels as if he is not good enough
* Blames himself for his problems
* Suddenly has fewer friends
* Avoids certain places
* Acts differently than usual

Signs your child may be a bully
 
* Becomes violent with others
* Gets into physical or verbal fights with others
* Gets sent to the principal's office or detention a lot
* Has extra money or new belongings that cannot be explained
* Is quick to blame others
* Will not accept responsibility for his actions
* Has friends who bully others
* Needs to win or be best at everything

Source: StopBullying.gov


Restorative Practices
Proactive win-win approach
Click & peruse left page: Restorative Practices... (includes videos)