Monday, December 26, 2011

Sometimes it only takes a little to change big things

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Friday, December 23, 2011

Kindness: The Power of Kindness

"Those who bring sunshine into the lives of others
cannot keep it from themselves."
- James Barrie
 Click here to watch this life-changing movie. 

Mac Anderson
Founder, Simple Truths



Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.
~ Theodore Isaac Rubin  

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

A Stop To Bullying Starts with Changing a Mindset

Presentation on bullying urges parents, educators to be involved
"Girls are just nasty to each other."
"It takes tough people to make it in this world."

Those are all examples of the kinds of statements -- and attitudes -- that need to be eliminated if we truly hope to reduce the problem of bullying, said Anthony Pierro, supervising assistant prosecutor in the Ocean County Prosecutor's Office's Juvenile Justice Division, as he addressed a gathering of parents, educators and members of law enforcement at the Ocean County Library on Thursday night.
Entitled "Cyberbullying: What You Need to Know as a Parent" and presented by the Ocean County Human Relations Commission, the program aimed to give parents a sense of the way and the kinds of bullying that go on with children and teenagers in 2011.
"We have to rid our brains of the idea that this toughens you up," Pierro said, because bullying is simply wrong.
While bullying has become more visible because of high-profile cases such as those of Rutgers student Tyler Clementi and Missouri teen Megan Meier, both of whom committed suicide in the wake of cyberbullying, Pierro and Detective James Hill, a supervisor in the high-tech crimes unit of the prosecutor's office, said they aren't sure they've seen a dramatic increase in the amount of bullying that goes on these days. Hill did say, however, that it's happening at younger and younger ages.
Part of the problem, Pierro and Hill said, is that because this generation's children are growing up with technology, they are far more savvy about how to use it, while at the same time not understanding the power that is in the technology they use.
"They don't see the boy crying himself to sleep every night after being bullied," Pierro said. "They don't know about the girl who kicks and screams about going to school because she doesn't want to be picked on for another day."
Pierro related a story of a school where he'd been asked to give a bullying presentation, where the principal warned him upon his arrival of a girl who was continually disruptive -- she had to be carried onto the bus to school in the morning, carried off the bus into school when she arrived, and was continuously in trouble for being disruptive in class.
At the end of his presentation, Pierro said, the girl -- a first-grader -- approached him and thanked him for coming. And then she told him how she hated being at that school. It turned out that the little girl had her hair pulled repeatedly every day by another student in class -- a problem that had gone on since kindergarten -- and when the girl reported it to her teacher, the teacher blamed her for being disruptive.
"We have to correct those attitudes," he said.
The presentation included a showing of the film "Sticks and Stones," a solemn portrayal of a shy teen boy who becomes friendly with a girl who is among the more popular students at school, and the scenario that unfolds when the girl's boyfriend discovers the shy boy is interested in her. The movie ends with the young man's suicide and his parents packing away his belongings.
The film, which was created in 2009 by the Bergen County Prosecutor's Office, is a powerful commentary on cyberbullying and the behaviors of teens, but also a cautionary tale for parents, laden with moments that give you much to consider about common issues: supervision, privacy, alcohol use and, of course, when and how much access they have to the various types of technology. In the film, the teens have computers in their rooms and cell phones and both are used in the bullying that goes on in the film.
While some would be quick to blame technology, the technology isn't the problem, officials said.
"We don't want parents going home and throwing the computer in the trash," Pierro said."The computer is a tool in doing these things, but it's not the cause."
Besides, said Earl Mosely, the anti-bullying coordinator in the Brick Township School District, "It's not the computer any more that's the biggest problem; it's the phone."
Because the technology is so widespread and because this generation of children are growing up with it, adults need to be proactive and wise about the use of it.
"Are parents utilizing it as a babysitting tool, the way our parents used television?" asked Ocean County Prosecutor Marlene Lynch Ford.
"It's an ever-changing climate that we're dealing with," said Trooper Adam Polhemus, a school resource trooper in Seneca High School.
That's why education is critical to solving the problem, Pierro said.
"We have to educate them (the children) on how to use it (the technology) and be aware of what they're doing," he said. "They need to understand that what they do through the use of that technology can be very hurtful," he said.
Pierro said one thing he believes will help foster a change in attitudes is the change in the laws that include the word "emotional" when describing harassment laws that target bullying behavior.
But in the end, it comes back to the parents, several of those in attendance said.
"You have to be proactive," Polhemus said. "You have to be invested in those lives," not only from the aspect of the kids who are victims of bullies, but of those who are doing the bullying.
"Parents have to be educated about why these things are wrong," Polhemus said.
"We are now the people who can stop this stuff," Pierro said. "We are in this together."
More about "Sticks & Stones"
The film, "Sticks & Stones," funded by the Bergen County Prosecutor's Office with money forfeited in criminal ventures, was conceived by the Park Ridge Police Department to address the issues of cyberbullying in particular.
Because of the intense nature of the storyline -- that ends with the boy's suicide after a harrowing exchange of instant messages with a person he believes to be the popular girl he's fallen in love with -- the film is only released to schools after those presenting it go through a training program that prepares them to address the multitude of issues involved.
It includes a detailed, 85-page curriculum guide that breaks down a variety of issues raised in the film.
They also require that schools have grief counselors on hand to assist students after the film has been shown, to address the suicide specifically and other issues in general.
For more information, visit www.cweducation.com/SticksStones.html

Monday, December 19, 2011

PBIS: Positive Behavior Intervention and Support

How is PBIS working for you?  What are your thoughts?

Teacher: How to address bullying in school — and how not to

This was written by Daniel Witz, a classroom teacher and educational consultant in the North Shore suburbs of Chicago. He has been working with middle school students for 25 years and views the school reform movement as highly focused on urban and impoverished schools while failing to spotlight shortcomings in more affluent suburban districts. He can be contacted through his website at danielwitz.com.

By Daniel Witz
PBIS stands for Positive Behavioral Intervention and Support, a disciplinary framework for schools to help prevent bullying that is, in my experience, heavy on jargon but light on substance.
Known by its acronym, PBIS (pronounced "peebis”) has become popular with administrators at thousands of schools across the country desperate to prove they are dealing effectively with bullying.
Kids laugh when I start an announcement that begins “Peebis activities for the week include….” Many simply don’t take it seriously.
But there’s a bigger problem: The pbis.org website markets itself as “one of the foremost advances” with “proactive strategies for defining, teaching, and supporting appropriate student behaviors.” Any time the phrase “proactive strategies” is used in education, I am on the lookout for a whole lot of nothing.
My criticism of PBIS at my school can be distilled into these points:
1) Students view the program as an acronym and some prizes.
2) The data collection and analysis piece is not properly addressed.
3) Lessons for classroom use fail the authenticity test.
The program’s shortcomings are easily understood by examining the implementation of PBIS at my school.
PBIS encourages all schools to create “3-5 behavioral expectations that are positively stated, easy to remember, and significant to the climate.”
The Internet is full of these school-created supports; search “PBIS posters” or “PBIS expectations” to uncover rows of acronyms that signal specific behaviors. There’s SOLE (Self Others Learning Environment) and SOAR (Supporting Others and Acting Responsibly) and ROAR(Respect Others Act Responsibly) and many more!
My school chose BAM, which stands for Be respectful, Act with integrity, and Make good choices. I’m fine with our school’s expectations, but in practice it is accepted by sixth graders, somewhat ignored by 7th graders and openly disdained by eighth graders.
The “positive behavioral support” part of PBIS comes into play when a student does something kind or helpful for another student or teacher. That student receives a “BAM” card entered into a weekly drawing for a prize. Teachers will compliment students on being BAM, BAMtastic, or on their general “BAMiness.” Weekly BAM lessons highlight traits such as personal responsibility or treating others with respect.
BAM does not reflect the serious nature of issues students face, nor does it teach students how to cope with the issues.
Proponents of BAM often speak in generalities about its effectiveness because the data collection and analysis component is undeveloped.
My school does not have an electronic data collection system for teachers to use in recording the behavior of students, nor does PBIS offer this type of solution in its implementation. Many schools use “office referrals” for measuring the success of PBIS. Office referrals are easy statistics to generate and are easy statistics to manipulate.
If a principal sets a goal of reducing referrals by 15% through PBIS implementation, he or she is in total control of the data. As we know from standardized testing, schools will cheat if the results make them look better.
Office referrals in most suburban districts rarely measure the climate of the school, or the amount of bullying going on behind the scenes. In schools with generally well-behaved students, most discipline meted out during the day does not reach the point of referral. Those interactions need to be recorded, but overworked teachers are not equipped to stop and enter data for every situation percolating in the halls, classrooms, cafeteria, or locker room.
Bullies understand the system and can get away with multiple negative acts before an office referral occurs. Many student-to-student negative behaviors occur in full view of a teacher and often skirt the line of acceptable. These offenses are the quality of life infractions that can ruin another kid’s day but are not severe enough for a teacher to send a student to the office. Included in this list might be an “inadvertent” jostling in the hall, using a mean (but not crude) nickname that a kid hates, pressuring a kid to share homework answers, or a borderline sexual innuendo.
Here I offer 10 steps to reduce bullying that I believe are broader and more relevant than PBIS to what actually happens among kids. These suggestions derive from my experiences in relatively well off suburban districts and may not relate to all districts.

1) Catalog Behaviors — Create a master list of behaviors that negatively affect the school’s educational climate. The list will be incorporated into a database and must be written with a nuanced understanding of school bullying. For example, “Taking another student’s property” is clearly on the list, but the list also needs to include, “Coercing a student to hand over property.” The kid who repeatedly and aggressively “borrows” lunch money or school supplies from a weaker student without ever intending to pay it back should be in the database.
Major hurdle to implementation: Over-policing student speech
The behavioral focus has to reflect the reality of adolescent thought. Comments like “I hate math class” or “I hate Mrs. Smith” sound negative, but are more about releasing frustration than bringing someone down. Teachers and students need coaching not just in spotting and correcting bullying; they need coaching in how to handle a little rejection. Students should not be entered into the database for saying, “I hate Maggie” or “I hate Devin.” However, starting an “I hate Maggie” club and getting others to “hate on” Maggie clearly crosses the line into harassment.

2) Collect, Access, Analyze, and Report on Data — Once the behaviors are generally agreed upon, the data collection must begin in earnest to identify problems, target remedies, and assess interventions. PBIS should have been developed with a user-friendly application as part of the program. Without an effective interface and database, the evidence is not recorded. Many companies have created these types of applications, but they are cumbersome to use.
Major hurdle to implementation: Available applications are inadequate.

3) Relevant Lessons and Specialized Instruction — Role-playing serious issues must be emphasized in lessons. Students need to be challenged as intensely as they would be in an advanced math class to prepare for the daily range of behaviors exhibited by their classmates and teachers.
Major hurdle to implementation: In my school every teacher serves as an advisor and will lead PBIS lessons regardless of background, desire, or skill set for this type of work. Would a school consider letting any staff member teach advanced algebra? In the wrong hands, even a well-intentioned lesson can muddle a student’s understanding of a concept. Only highly trained staff should be implementing these types of emotional wellness lessons.

4) Personnel Changes — Overhaul the job descriptions of the social workers and the deans. These administrators too often focus on the most visibly delinquent or at-risk students, while missing bullying that exists below the radar. Many students who are deeply troubled by their school experience do not speak up or act up enough to attract notice. There is only one way for a dean or social worker to combat the problems below the surface, and that is to have a working relationship with every single student in the school. School personnel should never forget that the “good kids” have problems too, and they often have information to share, because they believe in justice, fairness, and doing the right thing.
Major hurdle to implementation: The people skills required to establish strong relationships with diverse student populations are rare. I have witnessed too many “limited capacity” social workers who are only effective with “the girls” or “the outcasts” or whatever personality they are drawn to. Social workers must tend to all members of the flock and here I am not referencing race, ethnicity, and religion. I am referring to the artists and the band kids, the geeks and the overachievers, athletes and cheerleaders, skaters and scene kids, the a-listers and the wanna-bes.
Schools need to hire people who can successfully work with the entire spectrum of the student population.

5) Principals must be resourceful and resolute — Many school administrators and teachers are recklessly overconfident in their belief that “talking to” the bully or bringing them into the office will improve the situation. A slap on the wrist shows weakness and can lead to retaliation.
Administrators should solicit the opinion of students on the receiving end to understand their fear, their perspective, and the degree of harassment to see if this approach has potential. In some circumstances, the victims may be ready to stand up in the face of taunts if they knew a responsible adult “had their back.”
Let’s give students some life skills while standing ready to intervene. If a bullied student through coaching finds a way to stand up against the bully or to sidestep the verbal minefields, the victory will permanently elevate a student’s confidence. The situation will have to be closely monitored, as some bullies are more determined than others.
Administrators should always be prepared to bring justice in the form of a suspension or other serious consequence.
Major hurdle to implementation: Egos of school principals who think just “talking to” kids can turn around a bullying situation.

6) Teacher Supervision — Teachers must establish a presence in the hall when students are passing through. This is difficult to enforce as an administrator because teachers may be trying to give extra help to a student or finish a last-minute bit of preparation. The only way to change this culture is through discipline.
School principals should document infractions when a teacher fails to monitor an assigned area. Multiple infractions would lead to a reprimand and ultimately count against performance evaluation. I confess I would initially despise this type of enforcement, but I would eventually get over it, as I believe the hallway presence would be worth the sacrifice.
Without teachers supervising, monitoring, and data collecting, anti-bullying efforts are doomed to fail.
Major hurdle to implementation: Stubborn teachers

7) Personal Space — One major underlying cause of tension in schools is lack of personal space for students. Principals have offices, teachers have planning periods, but students have no place to get away from it all. Kids are crowded together in the halls, at lunch and recess, and even in the bathroom. If there is a way for schools to give kids some breathing space, all the better.
Along these lines, kids frequently singled out for their academic failures are more likely to act up.
Last year I had a student transfer in who was expelled from a private school. In smaller classes at the private school, he was singled out time and time again for his academic failures and ultimately turned that frustration against his classmates. In larger classes in my school he wasn’t singled out as much, and I found that if I kept the spotlight off his weaknesses, he rarely if ever was a behavior problem. If teachers excessively nag students and treat motivation issues as behavioral issues, they really will become behavioral issues.
Major hurdle to implementation: Inflexible school schedules. If I had their schedule and their lack of personal space, I’d lose my mind.

8) School design — School buildings should designed with an eye toward preventing bullying and managing behaviors. Planners and architects have incorporated technology challenges into the physical plant, but how many have been asked to design structures that minimize the potential for negative student exchanges?
Take a simple concept such as locker placement. I realize that space limitations may trump anti-bullying design, but lockers on both sides of a hallway are a recipe for trouble. Unless the hallway is unusually wide, all it takes is one or two students simultaneously visiting on each side to severely constrict traffic flow in the middle. Suddenly, kids are in each other’s personal space. The temptation for the comment, the push, the negative is too great. Hallways with lockers on one side tend to keep traffic moving along the empty wall on the opposite of the lockers.
The problem of bullying or vandalism in the bathroom should also be addressed on a structural level. Bathrooms are not easily monitored but this is the area where some of the worst transgressions take place. The design that I believe works best is when the staff bathroom is placed within the student bathrooms. This design exists in my current school where upon entering the bathroom, there is a locked door to the left that is for teachers only. The design ensures that teachers are continually monitoring the bathrooms out of necessity. There is an added benefit that the students never know when they see a closed door to the teacher’s bathroom whether it is occupied or not.
Major hurdle to implementation: Existing schools are stuck with their current designs.

9) Awareness — Here are three key levels of awareness middle school staff members should possess in order to successfully combat bullying.
a) Pay attention to non-verbal cues. Students reveal their problems more often non-verbally than by directly approaching a teacher. Teachers who understand a student’s typical demeanor can quickly recognize signs when something is amiss. Many instances of hidden bullying can be uncovered this way by listening and observing.
b) Avoid personal power struggles. Adolescents have a strong tendency to classify in black and white categories. This is most visible in social situations as friend/enemy and love/hate can switch in a moment’s notice. This mindset also plays out in discipline. Once a teacher makes “an enemy” of a student, that student will often view everything the teacher represents as not worthy of emulating. Discipline should be handled without a visible personal rejection of the offender. Once a student feels rejected by the adults in a school, the escalation of negative behaviors toward self or others is a given.
c) Identity formation is in flux. With social status at a premium it’s tempting for students in middle or upper grades to adopt an identity that will bestow a certain degree of cool. It takes little effort to become the slacker, partier, or hot girl, yet each one of these designations may bring more status than school-sanctioned identities such as student council representative.
A bully who is selective about his or her targets can generate a following more easily than many honor roll students. The bully frames his identity as “cool” while labeling his victims with some variation of “loser.” Teachers must always be on the lookout for identities based on empty attributes and move those kids toward identities formed with real skill sets and pathways to success.
Major hurdle to implementation: Too many teachers and administrators are only paying attention to grades, homework, and test scores.

10) Stop talking and do something. All of the talk surrounding bullying has reached a crescendo. The point of building consensus and appeasing all stakeholders has long since past. Too many kids hate school, and too many kids are treated poorly at school to discuss the issue any more.
If the teachers don’t want to monitor the hallways between periods, give reprimands, and then replace them with teachers who will. Any school district that does not collect accurate data on school bullying should be called out for failing its students.
Principals need to problem solve each situation independently and fix problems rather than make them worse with pompous grandstanding. They can start by finding better paths for the bully and developing some defense mechanisms for the victims. If that fails administrators should put the hammer down and risk offending some powerful parents by suspending their children. Districts need to fight lawsuits that try to keep schools from separating out the predators from the rest of us. Finally, everybody must collect and analyze data on a daily basis to uncover troublemakers, “hot spots” and patterns.
Major hurdle to implementation: Not everybody will be happy with how it’s done.

The limitations of my ability to reduce bullying can weigh on me at the end of the day. Sometimes I am disheartened by the systems in place, and some days I feel that my 47-year-old body is losing the battle to match the energy of my students. But 25 years of teaching and observing junior high students has given me clarity on how to move forward and make inroads against a seemingly intractable problem.
I don’t expect every student, parent, or educator’s steps to match mine. That’s fine. Make your own list and start acting on it.
Just please don’t bother organizing it into an acronym. By trying to make it “memorable,” your purpose may be forgotten along the way.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Olweus Bully Prevention Program: Dan Olweus

It was in 1999, in the wake of the Columbine massacre in Colorado in which 12 students and a teacher were killed, that the US Department of Justice selected the Olweus Bully Prevention Program as a model for their national violence prevention scheme. Since then the Olweus Program has been used in some 8000 US schools. It is also being used in Canada, the UK, Iceland, Germany and Ukraine.
In Norway the program has been shown to reduce bullying up to 50% and produce marked reductions in reports of vandalism, fighting, theft, and truancy.

Some of Olweus most notable success stories in the USA include three elementary schools in California that reported a 21% decrease in bullying after just one year. In Arizona several schools recorded a reduction of more than a quarter. The latest school to adopt Olweus is Great Neck Middle School in Virginia Beach, VA.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Sunday School Humor: 20+

Child is collecting church humor to help her as she faces the loss of her brother who was bullied, physically assaulted, & then committed suicide.


Mother shared above is helping daughter/sister move forward and help others.
If you would like a copy of (20+) Sunday School Humor, please request at saferschools@yahoo.com

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Butterfly Effect: Every single thing you do matters (video)

Dream Big!
"Every single thing you do matters. You have been created as one of a kind. You have been created in order to make a difference. You have within you the power to change the world.-Andy Andrews
The Butterfly Effect
Mac Anderson
Founder, Simple Truths

Victim of Bullying shared emotional scars

Friday, December 9, 2011By Amy Erickson
"Bill," upward of age 40, remembers playing baseball at age 6 -- not the home runs he hit -- but the vivid memories of being held down and forced to eat dirt.That year Bill became the target of a bully, whose actions would follow Bill through high school, college and into adulthood, leaving behind emotional scars.
"Many nights I would cry myself to sleep," he said.
For him, the bullying continually worsened from his experience on the baseball field a a young child to being assaulted around age 13, Bill said.
"Everyday occurrences included knocking books out of my hand, calling me crude names," he explained. "You almost live in a state of paranoia. It's the constant threat that really messes with you."
There are about 2.7 million students being bullied each year by about 2.1 students taking on the role of the bully, according to bullying statistics 2010.
Those statistics also revealed that 1 in 7 students in grades kindergarten through 12 has either been a victim of bullying or is a bully.
Bill said he had one main bully, who had "bully helpers," that plagued him from grade school through high school.
His antagonist was "a jock" of average size, but not really well liked by anyone, Bill said.
Bill, on the other hand, was as he put it "a geek" who excelled academically but was "horrible" at playing sports. His mom was a kindergarten teacher at the school.
Bill said he thinks that's why he was singled out to bully on the playground, in school hallways and around the community.
The belief that bullies target specific personalities is not necessarily true, according to Mary Buhman, a licensed independent social worker, in Le Mars.
"I don't know that it has anything to do with them going after geeks," she said.
Buhman speculated that bullies choose their victims because they see a personality trait they don't like about themselves in their victim.
In her private practice Buhman said she encounters a lot of bullying
"I see kids who have been bullied," she said. "I see kids who are the bullies."
Buhman doesn't see Bill as a client, but he is treated by a counselor.
Buhman said bullying gets more awareness today than in years past.
"I think it's always been an issue," Buhman added. "I think we're doing a much better job of educating."
She added that many schools also now have anti-bullying policies which help.
When Bill was a child those education tools didn't exist, and his experience of being bullied carried into his adult life.
By then he had learned the best way to fit it was to become the butt of the joke.
"I gave them a reason to make fun of me," Bill explained. "I can put myself down better than anybody on earth."
Into his 20s, 30s and 40s, that behavior began to affect his personal and professional life.
"I was not taken seriously," Bill said. "Even though they knew I was an intelligent guy, I think some people had a hard time looking past the comedian, the oaf."
He also puts the blame of his personality problems and daily living issues in the hands of his childhood antagonist, something Buhman said, during a separate interview, is a definite possibility.
"I have huge self-esteem issues. When I'm doing a project at work, I constantly ask 'am I doing this right and is it OK?'" he explained.
Bill said he also speaks in a loud voice, something his psychiatrist and counselor think is the result of wanting to be the center of attention.
"It's a constant battle to not have self-esteem issues," he said. "It's something I'll always have to deal with."
Bill said in very stressful situations he shuts down.
"I cannot move, cannot speak, cannot do anything," he said. "My doctor told me it's something (a defense mechanism) children use in an extremely violent situation."
Bill said he's currently dealing with the results of being bullied with talk therapy, personal development classes and medication.
"Today I feel like a different person," Bill said. "I'm able to communicate clearly. I understand my boundaries. I can prevent myself from being defensive and insecure."
Bill said he wants to make sure his children never become the targets of a bully and asks others to be aware and take action.
"If you see somebody getting bullied, don't just stand there and laugh or do nothing," Bill said. "That's where the differences can be made."
He added that when bystanders do nothing it adds to the bully's "power trip" telling him what he is doing is right and accepted.
Buhman said she agrees with Bill's thoughts 100 percent.
"I really do think if someone stepped forward and said 'why are you doing that, that's not even funny?' there wouldn't be bullying," Buhman said.
Bill encourages parents to teach their children that bullying is not OK.
"The surest way to cure a bully is when the people who are doing nothing, do something about it," he said.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

NC Gang Problem: websites/video

Sergeant Brandon Jones gave a little insight on the real impact gangs had on Triad communities. He is with the Alamance County Sheriff's Office City-County Gang Crimes Task Force & is a Task Force Agent with Safe Streets Task Force FBI in Greensboro.
Jones said the gang problem is worse that most people probably think.

"I don't know if it's ignorance to the problem, I don't know if it's lack of education, and a lot of that is what we're trying to break through, is educate ourselves as far as law enforcement goes: educate the public, educate the community, because it’s here. It's a lot worse than we realize. It's coming from other states, its being brought up from the younger generation now from people that are moving here."

Jones also said recent studies released by the F.B.I. state that up to 80% of all crime committed nationwide has some sort of gang tie to it. That statistic encompasses everything from murders, sexual assaults, to drugs.

Jones said there are things you can do to try to prevent gangs in your neighborhood. "Be vigilant in the activity that goes on in the neighborhoods. Don't dismiss activity because you may think that it’s just kids, or wanna be gang members perse. If it's an issue that you feel is something you feel needs to be brought to the police's attention, don't hesitate to call, that's what these tasks forces are set up for, is to combat the gang problem.".

Jones also said there's a website people can access and gather more information about gangs for themselves. The address is: www.ncgangcops.org.

N.C. gang prevention task force meets for first time : News-Record ...


www.news-record.com/.../nc_gang_prevention_task_force_meets_fo...Cached

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Nov 10, 2011 – Beverly Perdue to examine North Carolina's gang problems and recommend ways to prevent gang activity is ... TriadCareers.com Top Jobs ...

Gang areness Guide for North Carolina Communities

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The North Carolina Gang Investigators Association. (NCGIA) and .... problem, gangs have spread to the small cities ..... Tiny Rascal Gangsters
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What you should know about youth gangs in North Carolina

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Throughout North Carolina, families, law enforcement officials, and educators are confronting a dangerous and multifaceted problem: youth gangs. In February ...

News for Triad, NC gang problem

How Bad Is The Gang Problem In The Triad?

WFMY News 2 - 12/7/2011

Burlington, NC -- Triad law enforcement agencies worked together to make what some ... Jones said the gang problem is worse that most people probably think. ...

Monday, December 5, 2011

Carl Walker-Hoover/Jaheem Herrera: Anderson Cooper 360 Bullying


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Apr 27, 2009 - 8 min - Uploaded by ninjawarriordex3
Anderson Cooper 360 Bullying in Schools that result in Suicide Carl Joseph Walker Hoover Jaheem Herrera.


www.masslive.comBreaking News - MassLive.comEducationCached
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Oct 25, 2011 – If schools were forced to report all confirmed incidents of bullying, it would allow state education officials to gather data and develop new ...

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You +1'd this publicly.11 students awarded scholarships in memory of bullying victim Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover. Published: Saturday, April 16, 2011, 8:00 PM Updated: Saturday, ...

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Bystander: A Portrait in Apathy: Jillian Palmieri

Bystander: A Portrait in Apathy
www.bystander.us/bio.htmlCached - Similar
 
 
Jillian Palmieri: Prior to developing Bystander: A Portrait in Apathy, Jillian taught seventh grade for four years at Applegarth Middle School in Monroe Township, NJ.

Monday, November 28, 2011

PERSEVERE (Video/Speakers on)

Video: may words inspire, motivate, and empower you!

Copyright © 2010 - 2011 flickspire
Watch Persevere

Mac Anderson
Founder, Simple Truths

Monday, November 21, 2011

Proactively Protecting Our Children and Each Other

www.kidpower.org
We are too late to protect ten-year-old Ashlynn Connor, whose suffering led her to join the growing list of ‘bullycide’ tragedies. This is an emergency. We must all do everything we can to protect young people from despair and hopelessness by creating positive school cultures and empowering everyone...

Bullying prevention activities for elementary school children

     click    Bullying in schools | pacer.org
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Saturday, November 19, 2011

How Do We Proactively Empower Our Children & Each Other in the Face of Bullying?

Peruse and share this website: 
www.saferschools.blogspot.com

Contact: saferschools@yahoo.com 
www.bullypolice.org/RecommendedSpeakers.pdf
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If you are a speaker, specializing in an anti bullying speaking format, and would like to ... NC. ND. NE. NH. NJ - Edward Dragan - David J. Martin - Jillian Palmieri. NM. NV. NY - Parry .... The campaign began with a vigil to commemorate. Amanda ..... bullying. For 8th graders the emphasis is directed toward leaving a positive ...

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May 19, 2011 – SALISBURY — Eighth-grader Megan Braun isn't backing down to ... speakers for the candlelight vigil, dubbed “Beacons Against Bullying.” ...

Thursday, November 17, 2011

§ 115C‑105.47 Local safe school plans

What is your school system's local safe school plan?
Research & keep a copy readily available.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

LIFT: Law Institute for Teachers

The following informational presentation was created by Tom Stern, NCAE Attorney, and Deborah Stagner for the 2010 LIFT (Law Institute For Teachers) Conference sponsored by the Wake County Bar. 
(click following website)

Violence in the Schools - 2010 LIFT Conference


How can we effectively work to assure the safety of our children and school personnel?

Caring School Community: Research Results

Facts About Bullying - Nationally Recognized | DevStu.org
www.devstu.org/BullyPrevention

Monday, November 14, 2011

KidPower: Face Bullying With Confidence: 8 Skills Kids Can Use Right Away

By Irene van der Zande, Kidpower Executive Director

Here are some practices you can work on with the young people in your life.

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1. Walking with Awareness, Calm, and Confidence

People are less likely to be picked on if they walk and sit with awareness, calm and confidence. Awareness, calm and confidence means keeping one's head up, back straight, taking assertive steps, looking around, having a peaceful face and body, and moving away from people who might cause trouble.
Show your child the difference between being passive, aggressive and assertive in body language, tone of voice and choice of words. Have your child walk across the floor, coaching her or him to be successful, by saying for example; "That's great!" "Now take bigger steps", "Look around you" "Straighten your back." etc.

2. Leaving in a Powerful, Positive Way

The best self-defense tactic is called "target denial," which means "don't be there." Act out a scenario where maybe your child is walking in the school corridor (or any other place where he or she might bullied). You can pretend to be a bully standing by the wall saying mean things. Ask your child what these mean things might be because what is considered insulting or upsetting is different for different people, times, and places.
Coach your child to veer around the bully in order to move out of reach. Remind your child to leave with awareness, calm and confidence, glancing back to see where the bully is. Let your child practicing saying something neutral in a normal tone of voice like "See you later!" or "Have a nice day!" while calmly and confidently moving away. Point out that stepping out of line or changing seats is often the safest choice.

3. Setting a Boundary

If a bully is following or threatening your child in a situation where she or he cannot just leave, your child needs to be able to set a clear boundary.
Pretend to poke your child in the back (do this very gently; the idea is not to be hurtful). Coach your child to turn, stand up tall, put his or her hands up in front of the body like a fence, palms out and open, and say "Stop!".
Coach your child to have a calm but clear voice and polite firm words- not whiney and not aggressive. Show how to do it and praise your child for trying -even though she or he does not get it right to begin with. Realize that this might be very hard and triggering for your child (and maybe for you too).
Children need support to learn these skills. The idea is that your child takes charge of his or her space by moving away and, if need be, setting boundaries as soon as a problem is about to start - so that your child doesn't wait until the bullying is already happening.

4. Using Your Voice

If your child does get into a situation where somebody is trying to push or hit or knuckle her or his head, you could practice by holding your child gently and acting as if you are going to do the action gently. Coach your child to pull away and yell NO! really loudly. Coach him or her to say "STOP! I don't like that!" Coach your child to look the bully in the eyes and speak in a firm voice with both hands up and in front like a fence. Teach your child to leave and go to an adult for help.

5. Protecting Your Feelings From Name-Calling

Schools, youth groups, and families should create harassment-free zones just as workplaces should. However, you can teach children how to protect themselves from insults. Tell your child that saying something mean back makes the problem bigger, not better.
One way to take the power out of hurting words by is saying them out loud and imagining throwing them away. Doing this physically and out loud at home will help a child to do this in his or her imagination at school.
Help your child practice throwing the mean things that other people are saying into a trash can. Have your child then say something positive out loud to himself or herself to take in. For example, if someone says, "I don't like you, " you can throw those words away and say, "I like myself." If someone says, "You are stupid" you can throw those words away and say, "I'm smart." If someone says, "I don't want to play with you" then you can throw those words away and say, "I will find another friend."

6. Speaking Up for Inclusion

Being left out is a major form of bullying. Exclusion should be clearly against the rules at school. A child can practice persisting in asking to join a game.
Pretend to be a bully who wants to exclude.
Have your child walk up and say, "I want to play." Coach your child to sound and look positive and friendly, not whiny or aggressive.
Ask your child the reasons that kids give for excluding him or her. Use those reasons so your child can practice persisting. For example, if the reason is, "You're not good enough," your child can practice saying "I'll get better if I practice!" If the reason is, "There are too many already," your child might practice saying, "There's always room for one more." If the reason is, "You cheated last time," your child might practice saying, "I did not understand the rules. Let's make sure we agree on the rules this time."

7. Being Persistent in Getting Help

Children who are being bullied need to be able to tell teachers, parents, and other adults in charge what is happening in the moment clearly and calmly and persistently even if these adults are very distracted or rude - and even if asking for help has not worked before. Learning how to have polite firm words, body language and tone of voice even under pressure and to not give up when asking for help is a life-long skill.
We have found that practice is helpful for both children and adults in learning how to persist and get help when you need it. Here is one you can do with your child.
Pretend to be a teacher or someone else who your child might expect help and support from. Tell your child who you are pretending to be and where you might be at school. Have your child start saying in a clear calm voice, "Excuse me I have a safety problem."
You pretend to be busy and just ignore your child! Coach him or her to keep going and say: "Excuse me, I really need your help."
Act irritated and impatient and say, "Yes. what is it now?" and keep being busy.
Coach your child to say something specific like, "The girls over there are calling me names and not letting me play with them. I have told them I don't like being called names and that I want to play but they won't listen. " or "Those boys keep coming up and pushing me. I have tried to stay away from them but they keep coming up to me and won't leave me alone." At school, teachers want children to try to solve their problems first. However, adult intervention is needed if this does not work.
You say: "That's nice!" as if you heard but did not actually listen. This is very common for busy adults.
Coach your child to touch your arm and keep going "Please, to listen to me this is important". Now you get irritated and say "Can't you see I’m busy!?"
Tell your child that sometimes adults get angry and don’t understand but not to give up in asking for help and to say the specific problem again: "I do not feel safe here because (state specific problem again) ______________."
You minimize and say: "What's the big deal? Just stay away from them."
Coach your child to persistent and say again, "Having this happen is making me feel bad about going to school. Please, I really need you to listen."
Now change your demeanor so that your child can see you are listening and understanding and say "Oh! I am sorry I yelled at you and I am glad you are telling me. Tell me more and we will figure out what to do."
Remind your child that, if the adult still does not listen, it is not his or her fault, but to keep asking until someone does something to fix the problem. Tell your child to please always tell you whenever she or he has a problem with anyone anywhere anytime. Ultimately, it is the responsibility of adults to create safe environments for the children in their lives and to be good role-models for our children by acting as their advocates in powerful respectful ways.

8. Using Physical Self-Defense as a Last Resort

Children need to know when they have the right to hurt someone to stop that person from hurting them. At Kidpower, we teach that fighting is a last resort - when you are about to be harmed and you cannot leave or get help.
However, bullying problems are often not as clear-cut as other personal safety issues. Families have different rules about where they draw the line. Schools will often punish a child who fights back unless parents warn the school in writing ahead of time that, since the school has not protected their children, they will back their children up if they have to fight.
Learning physical self defense helps most children become more confident, even if they never have to use these skills in a real-life situation. Just being more confident helps children to avoid being chosen as a victim most of the time. There are different self defense techniques for bullying than for more dangerous situations -- let your child practice a self defense move like kicking someone in the shins, pinching someone's leg or upper arm, or hitting someone in the chest. You can practice in the air or by holding a sofa cushion. Consider sending your child to a class like Kidpower.

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